Emotional Intensity in Neurodivergent People
Strength, Overflow, and the Need for Containment
By Miriam Estrada Palma
Emotional intensity in neurodivergent people is not a symptom; it’s a language. A heightened way of existing in the world—feeling more, thinking more, loving more. Also suffering more.
Those born with a different nervous system process emotions differently: faster, deeper, more intensely. This intensity can be a creative strength and a channel for profound human connection, but also a source of dysregulation, somatization, and social misunderstanding.
This article explores the roots, manifestations, and challenges of emotional intensity in neurodivergent individuals from a personal, ethical, and scientifically grounded perspective.
What Is Emotional Intensity?
Emotional intensity refers to experiencing emotions more deeply, vividly, and persistently than average. For neurodivergent individuals—particularly those with bipolar disorder or high sensory sensitivity—this intensity isn't exaggerated; it’s a structural way of feeling.
It's not about occasionally having "strong emotions," but rather living with an emotional system that is constantly activated or expanding.
What the World Doesn’t See
When something hurts us, it pierces deeply.
When something excites us, it consumes us.
When we fall in love, it transforms us.
From the outside, it might seem disproportionate, exaggerated, dramatic, or unstable. But from within, it feels like living without emotional filters. Without protective layers. Fully open senses.
This often misunderstood intensity is frequently suppressed from childhood, leading either to emotional self-nullification or internal emotional explosions without adequate support.
Racing Thoughts, Relentless Emotions
A common manifestation of neurodivergent emotional intensity is ruminative or hypervigilant thinking. Some individuals spend hours analyzing, replaying, fearing, or anticipating minor emotional interactions, like an ambiguous comment or an evasive glance.
Additionally, they often experience:
Prolonged internal arguments
Fear of abandonment or misunderstanding
Sudden emotional shifts (from euphoria to despair)
Emotional explosions followed by exhaustion
Somatization: When the Body Speaks
When safe spaces to express intense emotions are lacking, the body absorbs them. Common somatic symptoms include:
Migraines or insomnia
Unexplained pains
Gastrointestinal disorders
Tremors, tachycardia, or internal electrical sensations (common in somatic therapy processes)
The body becomes the stage for the unspoken. According to psychiatrist Dr. Bessel A. van der Kolk, author of The Body Keeps the Score (2014), chronic emotional stress can trigger immune, hormonal, and neurological disruptions.
Love Hurts More, Too
We love with an intensity that might appear overwhelming—not out of dependence, but from resonance. Connections, presence, desire, and loss are amplified.
When we love, we engage fully. Losing someone feels like physical tearing. Rejection feels like being exiled from oneself.
Emotional intensity can forge profoundly meaningful bonds or cause ruptures that are difficult to metabolize.
Containment, Not Control
Society often attempts to "regulate" emotional intensity through suppression, judgment, or medication. But what neurodivergent individuals truly need isn't repression, but containment. Support. Validation.
An environment that allows saying: "I'm feeling a lot and need space to hold it," rather than demanding: "Calm down" or "Stop being dramatic."
The Value of Intensity
Being intense isn't a flaw; it’s a trait that requires awareness, self-care, and appropriate support.
Emotional intensity can be a source of creativity, compassion, and profound relationships.
It can drive us to create art, write, transform lives, and deeply connect with others.
But it also demands tools for self-regulation without suppression.
Like any great force, it needs channeling, not denial.
Therapeutic Recommendation: The Power of Psychosomatic Therapy
In my experience, emotional intensity began to transform only with real, supportive accompaniment.
Currently, I'm engaged in psychosomatic therapy. It isn’t just about talking; it's about learning to feel the body, supporting oneself amidst emotional overflow, recognizing that intense feelings are survivable.
My therapist has taught me that, when emotional impulses surge, I can seek physical grounding: lying down, sitting on the floor, leaning against a wall, touching the ground… feeling that something holds me.
The floor supports me. The bed supports me. The world supports me.
I am held. I don’t need to fear.
What Is Psychosomatic Therapy?
Psychosomatic therapy integrates body–mind–emotion, drawing from Wilhelm Reich, Alexander Lowen, Peter Levine, and Gabor Maté, enriched by trauma neurobiology, the autonomic nervous system, and Polyvagal Theory (Porges, 2011).
It goes beyond cognitive understanding, enabling the body to release trapped emotions by teaching:
Presence within the body
Recognizing physical sensations linked to emotions
Creating real physical anchors for emotional regulation (postures, blankets, a safe voice, firm surfaces)
Sensorimotor psychotherapy and somatic experiencing therapies have clinically shown effectiveness in improving emotional self-regulation, reducing PTSD symptoms, and restoring safety for highly sensitive or neurodivergent individuals (Ogden & Fisher, 2015).
Conclusion
Emotional intensity in neurodivergence is a complex, profound, often misunderstood experience. It isn’t an illness; it's a powerful and distinct way of existing.
The challenge isn't to extinguish intensity but to learn to inhabit it gently, consciously, and with supportive networks. To build spaces where emotional depth isn't punished, but welcomed.
Where feeling deeply isn't risky, but a path toward a vividly authentic life.
Recommended Specialist
Estephania Balado – Somatic Experience Therapist
📧 stephbalado@gmail.com | 📞 +33 623 90 39 98
Areas of Expertise:
Somatic Therapy: Releasing trauma stored in the body.
Nervous System Regulation: Restoring calm and resilience.
Burnout Prevention: Emotional exhaustion management.
Therapeutic Yoga: Mind-body integration.
Trauma-Centered Psychology: Deep healing tools.
References:
The Body Keeps the Score by Van der Kolk, Bessel A. (2014)
Aron, E. N. (1997). The Highly Sensitive Person. Broadway Books.
Linehan, M. (1993). Cognitive-Behavioral Treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder. Guilford Press.
Maté, G. (2003). When the Body Says No. Vintage Canada.
Grandin, T. (2013). The Autistic Brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
Porges, S. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory. Norton.
Ogden, P., & Fisher, J. (2015). Sensorimotor Psychotherapy: Interventions for Trauma and Attachment. Norton.
Levine, P. (1997). Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma. North Atlantic Books.